"Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working." - James 5:16 (ESV)
I feel rather ashamed of myself today, and I feel I owe all of my followers an apology. Allow me to explain:
Firstly, I wrote a post several days ago about praying for all people. Though I said I would pray for others every single day, I have not done it. Truthfully, I have barely been praying at all. I have made myself a hypocrite. Friends, I am so sorry for this. I owe God an apology as well for not spending time in prayer as I promised.
Secondly, I have not stayed off social media like I vowed to do. In fact, I have been on social media more than ever. Same goes for the news. When my mom called me out on this behavior a couple days ago, I brushed it off and said it was no big deal. My husband called me out as well. As someone who reads my posts, he knew that I had promised to stay off social media until further notice. But as he saw me scrolling through, he asked, "What happened to you being off social media?" I basically told him to leave me alone, and that it was none of his business. The worst part is, I knew I was being a liar and a hypocrite. I owe my husband, my mom, my readers, and my God an apology for this behavior.
Thirdly, I have been spreading discord. I have purposely started arguments over social media with a couple groups of people. This included the members of We The Kingdom. I stated my opinions indignantly at them. Frannie, the female vocalist, answered me with understanding. We ended up having a good discussion. Afterwards, I felt ashamed of myself rather than justified. I realized I was accusing her of something that I was doing myself: spreading discord. I apologized to her for my behavior. I also apologize to everyone else I have argued with over social media. It was silly and I feel ashamed of myself.
Friends, it is hard for me to be this vulnerable with you. It's embarrassing. I don't want to admit the faults I have. But James 5:16 says,"Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working."
I am so thankful that God gives grace and forgiveness. I am thankful for your forgiveness, too, dear friend. I am ashamed of my hypocrisy, my lies, and my anger and discord. I want to be better. I want to actually begin praying for other people everyday like I said I would! I want to stop letting my emotions control me. I want to stop lying about stuff I plan on doing, and really start doing it. I want to live more like Jesus. I want to pray powerful prayers!
In fact, I am going to start praying for others right now:
Father,
Thank You for Your grace. I am sorry for not living up to what I preach. Please forgive me for only praying for myself. God, I pray for all people. I thank You that You created them. They are loved by You. Please help me to pray this prayer every day. Help me to live out what You want me to do, and do only what You want. In Jesus's name I pray,
Amen