Love is Not Provoked.. So How Can God Be?

You also have done more evil than all who were before you, and you have gone and made for yourself other gods and cast metal images to provoke me to anger, and have thrown me behind your back— 1 Kings 14:9 NASB

This is God talking to the first king of Israel, Jeroboam, after the kingdom had been split in two. God had just handed Jeroboam the kingdom. It was established and at peace. Jeroboam did nothing to establish his reign; God did it for him. His only requirement was to rule righteously and follow God’s commands. His kingdom would have been established forever. Instead, Jeroboam ignored everything and literally kicked God to the curb. Wow. What a piece of work. No wonder God was angry about this cruel betrayal!

However, isn’t anger a contradiction to love? Scripture says that God is love, so how can He be provoked to anger? Even the description in the famous love chapter of 1 Corinthians 13 says that love is not provoked:

[Love] doesn’t behave itself inappropriately, doesn’t seek its own way, is not provoked, takes no account of evil, - 1 Corinthians 15:5

To answer this question, have you ever loved someone who's provoked you? Of course. Everyone we love will provoke us to anger at some point in our relationship with them. Being angry with someone doesn’t necessarily mean that we don’t love them. 

Be angry, and don’t sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath, Ephesians 4:26

We can see here that anger itself is not a sin, but the way we handle our anger very often is.

Then why does the description of love include that it is not provoked? Is Paul putting a burden on us that shouldn't be there? As with most misunderstood Bible passages, the answer is in reading the context of the entire passage. 

Paul is talking about being provoked into sinful behaviors. If we truly showed love to the person provoking us, we would stay calm when irritated. We wouldn't scream, throw things, cause damage, or abuse or mistreat the person we were angry at. We would deal lovingly with the wrong behavior instead of later having to deal with our own sinful behavior.

This is especially true when the other person’s offense deserves a harsh response. If our attitude is loving when correcting bad behavior, speaking harsh realities, or in giving punishments when our children are involved, the outcome later on will be much more accepted. The added bonus is that we won't have to deal with our own guilt. This is easier said than done.

Of course, in the case with God being provoked to anger by sin, His reaction will always be righteous. God has every right to deal with our bad behavior in His way. In fact, His correction is good for us—even if it doesn’t seem like it at the time. Did you know that if you are being corrected by God it is actually proof that you are loved by God?

You have forgotten the exhortation which reasons with you as with children, “My son, don’t take lightly the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by him; for whom the Lord loves, he disciplines, and chastises every son whom he receives.” It is for discipline that you endure. God deals with you as with children, for what son is there whom his father doesn’t discipline? But if you are without discipline, of which all have been made partakers, then you are illegitimate, and not children. Hebrews 12:5-8

As followers of Jesus, we have to continually work at not being provoked by other people’s behavior. How can we do this?

When something wrong, unfair, or sinful has been done to you:

1. Consider your reaction. Assess if you are allowing yourself to be provoked into sin, such as screaming, giving the cold shoulder, refusing to forgive being passive aggressive, or just plain aggressive. We have to remember that some people do know how to press the right emotional buttons within us so that we will react.

   
   

2. Dedicate yourself to prayer. In the heat of the moment it's very difficult to not react in sin, but as with anything else, if we prepare in advance, we have a better chance for success. If we start to focus on this in prayer before it happens, the Holy Spirit will help us to control our reactions. This is an especially important exercise if we have the tendency to handle bad behavior incorrectly. We need the grace of God to empower us to react correctly because our sinful nature can never achieve it.

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, please help me not to be provoked into sinful anger, and please give love and patience when I respond to others. I cannot do this without you. Amen.